The Wife: If you haven't figured it out already, we really like movies. Going to the movie theatre after a long day is a great way to relax. I bet you were expecting us to see Rise of the Planet of the Apes, but alas we chose the crude, yet fun, comedy. While I still want to see Rise of the Planet of the Apes (both James Franco and Tom Felton are in it!), I am quite pleased we chose The Change-Up. I was concerned that all of the funny parts were shown in the trailer, but I was completely wrong. It was hilarious and was much better than I expected it to be! In fact, I think it might just edge out Horrible Bosses in terms of humor. I pretty much laughed the entire time. I laughed so much that my abs, which were already sore from an ab workout, were in pain!
Honestly, I don't get why critics are trashing this movie. People seriously need to LIGHTEN UP! Sometimes a crude, foul-mouthed, ridiculous movie can be just the right medicine after a stressful day. Not every film has to be Oscar-worthy. Yes, I am talking to you, movie elitists! Also, if you want to see a good Ryan Reynolds movie, please see this instead of Green Lantern. Not only was Reynolds great, Jason Bateman was hilarious as well! With most comedy reviews, I can't say much more because I don't want to ruin all the jokes. If you want to just have a good laugh, go see The Change-Up!
Hobo Dan: Hi. How was your weekend? Mine, too short. See any good movies recently? So yeah the Wife pretty much summed up what I wanted to say about The Change-Up. It was just funny enough. I wasn't a huge fan of the end where it tired to send us all a message. I tend to like my comedies to just be uncensored funny. I guess I understand the whole idea of the switch-a-roo movie is that the people who have switched bodies are to see the light and realize how good they have it. I still felt the end dragged into this realm just a little too much. All in all it was a passable funny movie. There were great moments and boring moments. If you haven't seen it, I'd wait till your bored one evening and it's on Netflix.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Programing Notes
So I just plain ran out of ideas for today’s post. That’s when the Wife suggested I cop out and write about our upcoming posts for this month and fall. I proceeded to rudely inform her that the only thing I cop is a feel, but you probably don’t want to read the rest of that sentence. I told her I do not cop out on this blog and that I’d come up with something. I did not. That low nagging sound you hear is her explaining to me (again) that she is anyways right. I really think this heat has got to me. Every time I sit down to write my brain heats up and I feel like it’s going to explode. Then it does and I spend the next hour guiding my headless body around on all fours scooping slimy bits of brain back into my skull. So without brain power or will, I’ve decided to cop out and preview the blog for you. I feel so shameful. This schedule only includes the Thursday posts. Movie Monday will continue to be filled with Best Picture Project posts (Casablanca and Crash upcoming) and more current movie reviews.
See that paragraph you just read? Yeah I wrote that before I went to lunch and life struck me down with inspiration. It’s amazing how you can be so blindsided by people. A little back story? I frequent Little Caesars Pizza for lunch. I always get one bag of bread sticks without sauce and Mt. Dew. It helps that it is just across the street from where I work. Most of the time I go there when I’m feeling too lazy to drive or walk far (which is most of the time). So yesterday I ventured across the street. To my horror, I walked in the door and they had a plastic bag waiting for me with two bags of bread sticks and a Mt. Dew already to go. The guy said “I put a second bag of bread in there for you since you’re such a good customer.” I walked out of the store and instantly stepped in front of traffic in an attempt to end it all. Seriously I’m that guy? Not a good customer of say, a coffee shop or book store. Not even a damned comic shop? No, I’m the good customer of Little Caesars Pizza. Life has a funny way of telling you it’s time for a life style change.
Now back to your regularly scheduled cop out post…
Next Thursday (August 11) is my Fall Movie Preview. This time I’ll be covering September, October and November releases. For some reason this looks like a terrible fall season for new releases. While that is bad you viewers, it’s usually pretty good for me. It’s much less effort to verbally assault movies like Shark Night 3D than Transformers 3. But who am I kidding; I don’t have trouble poking fun at any movies. Go a head, try me! Find a movie I won’t/can’t mock. I double dog dare you.
On August 18 the Wife and I will celebrate four years of murder free marriage. To mark the occasion I will be composing a lovely blog post for your reading pleasure. It may or may not contain embarrassing stories.
August 25 the Wife will be going solo (gigity) with her very own Fall 2011 TV Preview. She is going to break down all the major network’s upcoming shows, from returning favorites to fresh meat sure to only get one season before being devoured by a new CSI or Law & Order. You’ll also get a good idea why I don’t watch much television and what keeps me up at night clinging to my sword in an attempt to protect my very soul from the civilization destroying powers of the Jersey Shore and just about anything else MTV does these days.
September 1 will bring our full on explosion of information about the 2011 Mothman Festival in Point Pleasant, West Virginia. It runs from Friday, September 16 to Sunday, September 18. Not only do we hope you enjoy our preview, but we also hope it compels you to come to the festival and see it for yourself. Let us know you’re coming and we will make sure to meet up with you!
I’ve thought long and hard about revealing this final point. I came to the conclusion that if I’m serious about finishing it then there is no better motivation than to publicize it now. For a few weeks I’ve been working on some short episodic stories. The idea is to write around 10 of them and then publish them here on Thursdays every week. This goes back to the original idea for this blog, which was to get me writing on a regular basis. Assuming I really finish the first 10 episodes and that they aren’t just terrible, I plan to start their publication early to mid October.
See that paragraph you just read? Yeah I wrote that before I went to lunch and life struck me down with inspiration. It’s amazing how you can be so blindsided by people. A little back story? I frequent Little Caesars Pizza for lunch. I always get one bag of bread sticks without sauce and Mt. Dew. It helps that it is just across the street from where I work. Most of the time I go there when I’m feeling too lazy to drive or walk far (which is most of the time). So yesterday I ventured across the street. To my horror, I walked in the door and they had a plastic bag waiting for me with two bags of bread sticks and a Mt. Dew already to go. The guy said “I put a second bag of bread in there for you since you’re such a good customer.” I walked out of the store and instantly stepped in front of traffic in an attempt to end it all. Seriously I’m that guy? Not a good customer of say, a coffee shop or book store. Not even a damned comic shop? No, I’m the good customer of Little Caesars Pizza. Life has a funny way of telling you it’s time for a life style change.
Now back to your regularly scheduled cop out post…
Next Thursday (August 11) is my Fall Movie Preview. This time I’ll be covering September, October and November releases. For some reason this looks like a terrible fall season for new releases. While that is bad you viewers, it’s usually pretty good for me. It’s much less effort to verbally assault movies like Shark Night 3D than Transformers 3. But who am I kidding; I don’t have trouble poking fun at any movies. Go a head, try me! Find a movie I won’t/can’t mock. I double dog dare you.
On August 18 the Wife and I will celebrate four years of murder free marriage. To mark the occasion I will be composing a lovely blog post for your reading pleasure. It may or may not contain embarrassing stories.
August 25 the Wife will be going solo (gigity) with her very own Fall 2011 TV Preview. She is going to break down all the major network’s upcoming shows, from returning favorites to fresh meat sure to only get one season before being devoured by a new CSI or Law & Order. You’ll also get a good idea why I don’t watch much television and what keeps me up at night clinging to my sword in an attempt to protect my very soul from the civilization destroying powers of the Jersey Shore and just about anything else MTV does these days.
September 1 will bring our full on explosion of information about the 2011 Mothman Festival in Point Pleasant, West Virginia. It runs from Friday, September 16 to Sunday, September 18. Not only do we hope you enjoy our preview, but we also hope it compels you to come to the festival and see it for yourself. Let us know you’re coming and we will make sure to meet up with you!
I’ve thought long and hard about revealing this final point. I came to the conclusion that if I’m serious about finishing it then there is no better motivation than to publicize it now. For a few weeks I’ve been working on some short episodic stories. The idea is to write around 10 of them and then publish them here on Thursdays every week. This goes back to the original idea for this blog, which was to get me writing on a regular basis. Assuming I really finish the first 10 episodes and that they aren’t just terrible, I plan to start their publication early to mid October.
Monday, August 1, 2011
Review: Horrible Bosses
Hobo Dan: Ah, it's glorious to escape the death and destruction that surely would have ensued if my wife had made me see The Smurfs movie. I so dreaded seeing that movie because it looked like crap. It is also nice to go to a movie that has been out for a while, so I can be all antisocial. There is nothing worse than seeing a movie while sitting next to Mr. can't sit still. Or Mr. sweaty nerd. Or Mr. over powering cologne. Or Mr. has to talk the whole time. I've had all these experiences this summer. I really need to be a professional at is so I can see all the movies in empty theatres like that fat guy who hates video games. Horrible Bosses was pretty funny. Not the funniest movie I've ever seen, but pretty good. I do think it was better than Hangover 2. It's your average idea; characters in ridiculous situations, making even more ridiculous decsions, cussing along the way. It was nice to see Charlie Day from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia; he is always funny. I'm not going to say too much more because it funny and I don't want to ruin it for you. If you like funniness go see it. Or at this point wait until it comes to Blu-Ray or Netflix because with how fast things are coming out these days it could be out tomorrow.
The Wife: After joking with the husband pretty much the entire summer about making him see The Smurfs movie, I made the decision to see Horrible Bosses instead. I think The Smurfs could be cute, especially because Neil Patrick Harris is in it *swoons*. However, when old childhood favorites become movies the results can be disastrous. I would still like to see Smurfs, but I can wait to Netflix it. As for Horrible Bosses, I had wanted to see it for awhile. I love funny movies. Horrible Bosses was released when we were in Florida, and when we returned from vacation we had the two major summer movies to see: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 and Captain America. So, I was excited to finally have the opportunity to see Horrible Bosses as well as to escape the child crowded movie theatre that certainly would have coincided with The Smurfs.
If you have a sense of humor, then go see Horrible Bosses or at least plan to add it to your Netflix queue. Although it wasn't quite at the level of The Hangover funny, it was still pretty hilarious. I really enjoyed the cast. As the husband mentioned, it was nice to see Charlie Day from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia on the big screen. Jennifer Anniston also rocked this movie. It was fun to see her play a very different role from her usual movie genre. I can't really say anything more because I don't want to spoil the jokes.
The Wife: After joking with the husband pretty much the entire summer about making him see The Smurfs movie, I made the decision to see Horrible Bosses instead. I think The Smurfs could be cute, especially because Neil Patrick Harris is in it *swoons*. However, when old childhood favorites become movies the results can be disastrous. I would still like to see Smurfs, but I can wait to Netflix it. As for Horrible Bosses, I had wanted to see it for awhile. I love funny movies. Horrible Bosses was released when we were in Florida, and when we returned from vacation we had the two major summer movies to see: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 and Captain America. So, I was excited to finally have the opportunity to see Horrible Bosses as well as to escape the child crowded movie theatre that certainly would have coincided with The Smurfs.
If you have a sense of humor, then go see Horrible Bosses or at least plan to add it to your Netflix queue. Although it wasn't quite at the level of The Hangover funny, it was still pretty hilarious. I really enjoyed the cast. As the husband mentioned, it was nice to see Charlie Day from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia on the big screen. Jennifer Anniston also rocked this movie. It was fun to see her play a very different role from her usual movie genre. I can't really say anything more because I don't want to spoil the jokes.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Shark Week 2011!!!!!
The Wife has a very important public service announcement for you all.
The Wife: Well ladies and gentleman, we are one day away from the greatest week in television. That's right, 2011 Shark Week officially kicks off tomorrow on The Discovery Channel. It is sure to be a "jawsome" time! As they say in the movie Step Brothers, Shark Week is "raw power." I mean really, what's not to love about Shark Week? I have good vibes this year as Andy Samberg will be hosting this epic television event! I really hope he hosts "on a boat."
Why is Shark Week so amazing? I can't even really explain it. Sharks are creepy, fascinating creatures. Constant shows that talk about all things shark every day makes Shark Week worth it. I also am captivated by the specials that show the shark attacks over the past few years. I have a fascination with good shark movies like Jaws, and even awesomely bad ones, like Deep Blue Sea, but Shark Week's "real footage" just takes the cake!
Several new shows will run for this year's Shark Week, including The Great White Invasion, which premieres Sunday at 9 p.m.! Rogue Sharks, Killer Sharks and Jaws Comes Home are other new shows set to appear this year. I personally can't wait for Summer of the Shark (scheduled for 10 p.m. Monday, August 1). I am also REALLY PUMPED for How Sharks Hunt, set to air on Wednesday, August 3 at 9 p.m., because the stars of one of my favorite shows, Dual Survival, will be on this special! This means more unintentionally funny commentary from Cody and great one-liners from Dave! (Seriously, if you haven't watched Dual Survival yet, check it out ASAP...it is hilarious!) The Shark City special (9 p.m. Thursday, August 4) should be pretty good as Andy Samberg will be in it. Of course old Shark Week favorites, like Ultimate Air Jaws and 10 Deadliest Sharks, will return as well!
For a full schedule of shark biting fun and entertainment, here is the complete Shark Week 2011 lineup!
So be sure to enjoy this jawsome-winning event! If you are a fellow lover of Shark Week, tell us why you enjoy this television event so much! YAY for Shark Week!
The Wife: Well ladies and gentleman, we are one day away from the greatest week in television. That's right, 2011 Shark Week officially kicks off tomorrow on The Discovery Channel. It is sure to be a "jawsome" time! As they say in the movie Step Brothers, Shark Week is "raw power." I mean really, what's not to love about Shark Week? I have good vibes this year as Andy Samberg will be hosting this epic television event! I really hope he hosts "on a boat."
Why is Shark Week so amazing? I can't even really explain it. Sharks are creepy, fascinating creatures. Constant shows that talk about all things shark every day makes Shark Week worth it. I also am captivated by the specials that show the shark attacks over the past few years. I have a fascination with good shark movies like Jaws, and even awesomely bad ones, like Deep Blue Sea, but Shark Week's "real footage" just takes the cake!
Several new shows will run for this year's Shark Week, including The Great White Invasion, which premieres Sunday at 9 p.m.! Rogue Sharks, Killer Sharks and Jaws Comes Home are other new shows set to appear this year. I personally can't wait for Summer of the Shark (scheduled for 10 p.m. Monday, August 1). I am also REALLY PUMPED for How Sharks Hunt, set to air on Wednesday, August 3 at 9 p.m., because the stars of one of my favorite shows, Dual Survival, will be on this special! This means more unintentionally funny commentary from Cody and great one-liners from Dave! (Seriously, if you haven't watched Dual Survival yet, check it out ASAP...it is hilarious!) The Shark City special (9 p.m. Thursday, August 4) should be pretty good as Andy Samberg will be in it. Of course old Shark Week favorites, like Ultimate Air Jaws and 10 Deadliest Sharks, will return as well!
For a full schedule of shark biting fun and entertainment, here is the complete Shark Week 2011 lineup!
So be sure to enjoy this jawsome-winning event! If you are a fellow lover of Shark Week, tell us why you enjoy this television event so much! YAY for Shark Week!
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Rantopia
You don’t have to fill these silences with idiotic, patronizing, sympathetic small talk. Seriously, shut up. I’m so tired of listening to the sound of your voice I could crap my pants and be happier. Why do so many people hate silence? If I’m sitting quietly, working; it does not mean I am bored, lonely, upset or desperately longing for human interaction. It means I am sitting quietly, working, hoping beyond hope to be left alone. Some people need their coffee in the morning, others their breakfast; I need three hours of not being asked if I’m feeling okay because I’m being so quiet. But noooooo, people come with their questions and their comments and their stupid little thoughts that probably wouldn’t make a blip on a CAT scan. Shut up. Sometimes it’s okay to just be quiet. Don’t we spend enough time being bombarded by noise? Remember silence is golden, and your face will be crimson if you don’t stop talking to me!
Speaking of word vomit, can anyone here explain to me how a conversation about the weather gets derailed so badly that it ends talking about anal caesarian section? I simply stated: “It’s hot out there.” Absently in a way that really means, I don’t want to talk to you, but I have to. The conversation went on to cover the heat and then this psycho old lady starts telling me about how she can’t get her kids to stop having grand babies. Apparently the Fourth of July is really hard on grandmas? According to her, it is. When did we start giving out gifts on Independence Day? She had a solution to solve this problem though, spay and neuter her children. I guess her only problem now is getting them all to the vet. Everyone, this is an actual conversation. Well, less conversation and more her talking at me while I try desperately to not laugh. Not the first chat I’ve had with her either. Once before she decided to inform me she was on the way to the hospital to have surgery. Apparently she had major complications from child birth. These complications have haunted her well into her sixties? Don’t worry she told me the complication. According to old crazy pants, the doctor was forced to remove her son via her rectum. Take a moment to read that again and soak in all the crazy. Done? Yeah, there is absolutely NO situation where a doctor would take that route to remove a child from its mother. Furthermore, why, why, why god why, are you telling me this?
Speaking of word vomit, can anyone here explain to me how a conversation about the weather gets derailed so badly that it ends talking about anal caesarian section? I simply stated: “It’s hot out there.” Absently in a way that really means, I don’t want to talk to you, but I have to. The conversation went on to cover the heat and then this psycho old lady starts telling me about how she can’t get her kids to stop having grand babies. Apparently the Fourth of July is really hard on grandmas? According to her, it is. When did we start giving out gifts on Independence Day? She had a solution to solve this problem though, spay and neuter her children. I guess her only problem now is getting them all to the vet. Everyone, this is an actual conversation. Well, less conversation and more her talking at me while I try desperately to not laugh. Not the first chat I’ve had with her either. Once before she decided to inform me she was on the way to the hospital to have surgery. Apparently she had major complications from child birth. These complications have haunted her well into her sixties? Don’t worry she told me the complication. According to old crazy pants, the doctor was forced to remove her son via her rectum. Take a moment to read that again and soak in all the crazy. Done? Yeah, there is absolutely NO situation where a doctor would take that route to remove a child from its mother. Furthermore, why, why, why god why, are you telling me this?
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