Third Annual Mothman 5k

Shameless self promotion to follow...

Everyone, did you know the Wife and I put on a world class 5k road race every year? Amazing, but true. The Third Annual Mothman 5k run/walk will be commencing at 8:30 a.m. on September 15, 2012 in Point Pleasant, West Virginia. The run is in coordination with the Eleventh Annual Mothman Festival. You can pre-register for the race by going to this link, downloading the form and sending it in. Pre-registration costs $15 and ends on September 8! You can also show up the day of the race and sign up. Race day registration (or check in and pick up for those pre-registered) begins at 7 a.m. and ends at 8:15 a.m. The cost on race day is $20. The first 50 participants receive a Mothman 5k T-Shirt. All participants receive a goody bag. Optional hugs will also be on hand. Prizes will be given out for the overall Male and Female winners as well as age group winners. For more and up to date details, like Mothman5K on Facebook and follow on Twitter @mothman5k.

The race route travels through historic downtown Point Pleasant. Starting at the beautiful Tu-Endie-Wei State Park, the race travels up Main Street, past the Mothman Statue and Festival area, before turning right onto Ohio Street and then right onto Kanawha Street. A left hand turn puts you on a quick loop around the block near Harmon Park (Camden Ave. to Madison Ave. to Poplar St.) before returning you to Kanawha Street and heading back downtown the way you came. From there the course returns to Ohio Street and then finally back to Main Street. The finish line runs parallel to the iconic Mothman Statue in the heart of the Festival area.

As a former runner I can tell you this course is a lot of fun. Okay, we designed it too, so I'm biased. It is very flat save for a slight incline on Camden Ave. Except for a hundred meters or so of historic brick streets at the start, the course is all asphalt and well kept roads. The route will be well marked with signs, bright neon paint marks with a the pace car from the Point Pleasant Police Department. However, the roads are not closed to traffic during the race, so we do encourage participants to be aware. The course also crosses train tracks. No trains are scheduled at the time of the race, but we do ask participants to be advised and watch your ankles!

The start line at Tu-Endie-Wei State Park has a gorgeous view of the confluence of the Kanawha and Ohio Rivers. The Park itself has many interesting historical markers including The Point Pleasant Battle Monument, erected on October 10, 1909 as a tribute to a battle fought on the same date in 1774. The Park also has The Mansion House Museum, originally a tavern built in 1796, now a historic house museum. Very close to the start line is the Point Pleasant River Museum. The meat of the race takes you through historic downtown Point Pleasant, past the Mothman Statue and the Silver Bridge Memorial. Once the race is over we encourage all participants to stick around for the festival and explore the town of Point Pleasant.

Here is a map! To trick Google Maps I had to use a few extra Destination points (C and E). The start is Point A. Point B is the One Mile mark. Point D is the Two Mile mark. Point F is the finish line!

View Larger Map

Post Theatrical Release

While reviewing The Campaign on Monday, I found myself in a conundrum. I instructed people to "otherwise wait for the video release." In editing, The Wife changed the word "video" to "DVD" because she thinks the term video is too dated. Then I thought, isn't the term DVD dated?

But I don't want to call these Blu-ray either, that sounds like I am supporting Sony over all other formats. Nor do I want to list every platform the film could possibly be ported to. Think about all the ways you can buy or rent movies these days: DVD, Blu-ray, iTunes, Netflix, Redbox, Fancy Tom the bootlegging hobo out behind Wal-Mart, Hulu, Amazon; hell, I bet you can still get VHS copies somewhere. The list goes on. I'm sure someone is working on a new super High Definition format to replace Blu-ray that will beam the image directly into our eyes, melting our corneas.

I used the term video, because I knew that everyone would understand what I meant. I did not originally use DVD, because that is very specific to a DVD disc. It never occurred to me that people would instantly associate video with VHS, but the first person to read the term sure did. So what can I call them? Someone please help me! I hate brand association. I want a term for a movie that was in theaters and is now in a format that allows you to buy or rent a copy. The list below are a few of my own suggestions. What are yours?

PTR - Post Theatrical Release Copy (Bleck!!! That's boring. Also, thanks to Fifty Shades of Grey, The Wife giggles everytime I use the word "release")
VIWHUTYKUWT - Version I will have to update in two years to keep up with technology (a little wordy)
SSE - Small Screen Edition (sounds fancy!)
Rental (simple but only works for Netflix, Redbox and the others, not so much for if you buy it)

Review: The Campaign

The Wife: With two new movies coming out, The Campaign and The Bourne Legacy, we had to pick one to see first. Well, for those of you that actually know me, you know that there was really no contest. While I enjoy the Bourne series, Will Ferrell movies will always win out! Plus a Bourne movie without Matt Damon can wait another week.

I carry a biased opinion somewhat because as mentioned above, I love Will Ferrell movies. Pairing him with The Hangover’s Zach Galifianakis seemed like a recipe of pure, comedic gold for me, so The Campaign = a win-win situation. Not to mention a movie that mocks both sides of the political spectrum was the perfect medicine after weeks of reading useless, pointless, annoying Facebook arguments regarding the upcoming Presidential election. Well, The Campaign was exactly what I hoped and expected it to be: a couple hours of sheer stupidity and hilarious comedy. Ferrell was at his best, as usual, and Galifianakis simply added to the hilarity. Also, the brief appearance from Jason Sudeikis, who play’s Ferrell’s character’s campaign advisor, was notable as well.

The name of the movie is pretty self-explanatory as the movie centers on the election of Democrat Incumbent Cam Brady (Ferrell) and Republican new-comer and challenger, Marty Huggins (Galifianakis). Of course, the two engage in entertaining debates filled with stupid rhetoric as well as take part in ridiculous campaign mudslinging. Much of these things pokes fun at our current political debates/issues, which at times was scary since so much of what was on screen actually does happen in some (less funny, of course), way. There is a moral of the story at some point as the movie does have a semi-plot, but come one folks, a plot and moral is not why we watch Will Ferrell movies. And if you do watch his movies seeking these things then you really need to re-think your life.

Overall, The Campaign was simply put (as I’ve said way too many times in this review) hilarious. Fortunately, not all funny parts were shown in the previews, which sadly happens with many comedies. I enjoyed that this movie mocked politics as well as poked fun at “both sides” of the political spectrum. Sometimes you just need to laugh and you need a stupid movie, where you don’t have to use too much brain power. Frankly, for those of you who are on the anti-funny movie train, please grow a sense of humor. Not everything you see needs to be Oscar-worthy. If you are one of those types, I truly feel sorry for you. Lighten up! If you are as jaded with politics as I am and love Will Ferrell movies, then by all means head to the theatre for this one. However, if you enjoy funny movies but want to save your money, then this would be ok to wait for Netflix too as it really isn’t anything new from Ferrell (which is fine by me).

Hobo Dan: If you have seen any Will Ferrell movie ever made, you have a good idea what to expect from The Campaign. He is the quintessential dumb, slap stick, bumbling fool everyone loves to laugh at. Every movie he is in turns into this. Pay no attention to any of the other actors in the film; Will is here to be Will. I thought Zach Galifianakis could overcome this effect. I was wrong. Zach is totally over shadowed by the dumbness of Will Ferrell in this movie. I usually get a good laugh or two from Galifianakis and his subtle facial expressions, but he seemed totally lost in The Campaign. Lost, or in awe of just how dumb Will Ferrell really can be.

Don’t get me wrong, this movie had some really funny parts. I laughed. But nothing took me rolling into the aisles, giggling wildly as slurpee spews from my nostrils. I don’t know if Ferrell and company have lost a step, or just keep repeating the same old antics to the point that I am now immune to that form of idiocy. I suspect the latter. I never thought this could be true, but maybe I can only laugh at a full grown man acting like a retarded twelve year old so many times. Please understand, this kind of comedy has its place. I loved Anchorman and Talladega Nights. Step Brothers is the underrated king of the Will Ferrell genre in my opinion. I just think at this point in my life (and after the endless string of movies like this), I am ready for something a little more clever than crass. If you still hold a special place in your heart for Will Ferrell, then go see this, otherwise wait for the DVD release.

Ten Shark Movies!

In honor of Shark Week 2012, The Wife asked that I put together a comprehensive list of the ten greatest shark movies of all time. I went into my troll cave and made this list instead. The following shark movies may (and in many cases may not) be any good at all...

Number 10: Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus
I have not seen this movie. I searched for Shark movies to research this post. As soon as I saw the title of this film, I knew it had to be included. I never plan to see this movie nor watch the trailer, or even read a plot synopsis. No, I think all I need to know is in the title: Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus. That about sums it up. Sure, never judge a book by its cover, but I seriously doubt this is really a commentary on current race relations in the United States or a savy political drama about money, power, corruption and George Clooney. I'm pretty sure its about a Mega Shark and a Giant Octopus who get into a fight over some poorly written plot points.

Number 9: Shark Night 3D
Here is the IMDB description of this movie: "A weekend at a lake house in the Louisiana Gulf turns into a nightmare for seven vacationers as they are subjected to shark attacks." Umm... So... don't get in the water? The IMDB entry goes on to read "They soon come to the realization that 15 species of sharks are lurking in the water, and with no form of boat or transportation, and no signals for phone's, the group of seven now face a fate they would never imagine." No, stop it. Really? Did anyone see this movie. Why?

Number 8: Blood Surf
I have a feeling that this is a bad movie. Want proof?


Number 7: Any Given Sunday
The gripping tale of the Miami Sharks professional football team as it struggles with injuries and egos must rank among the great shark films ever made because it's my list and I say so. Plus it has Al Pacino, who looks like a man shaped shark...

Number 6: Raging Shark
The plot of Raging Shark: Doctor Mike Olsen returns from his oceanic observation station, where his wife Linda feels in charge, when it's reported in desperate trouble after a sudden shark attack wrecked the oxygen supply. The accompanying ship and even the coast guard are also attacked, and soon other sites in and around the Bermuda triangle, where a few years earlier an alien space-ship crashed, which now seeps a mysterious organic crystal. The US Navy sends a submarine, which also carries bureaucrat Ben Stiles, who berates safety and other violations aboard. More dangers lurk inside as getting out proves physically daunting. It made the six spot just for that.

Number 5: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Stay with me here. During the second task of the Tri-Wizard Tournament, the competitor for Durmstrang, Victor Krum, morphs himself into a shark to recover something the merpeople have taken into the Black Lake. Shark movie.

Number 4: Jaws 2
Not really a bad movie. It couldn't possibly live up to the original, but still not a bad movie.

Number 3: Shark Tale
Okay so this is actually a pretty good movie, even if it is reactionary a Finding Nemo rip off. Ever notice the rule of two in movies? When Volcano came out, so did Dante's Peak. Armageddon, Deep Impact. It goes on and on. Generally one is considered good and the other repetitive rubbish. Well Shark Tale is actually pretty entertaining as kid movies go.

Number 2:  Deep Blue Sea
"They ate me! A mother f***ing shark ATE ME!"

Number 1: Jaws
Seriously, there is no better shark movie. Despite giving sharks a very negative stereotype that persists even today, Jaws is one great movie. It is without question the greatest shark movie ever made and must be at least in the top 100 films of all time. Now excuse me, I have to go follow The Wife around as she shops for clothes; should I  hum the Jaws soundtrack as I mindlessly stalk the isles?

Shark Week 2012

Raw Power

The Wife: After months, weeks and days of anticipation, the greatest week of television EVER is almost here! That’s right Dump readers, SHARK WEEK 2012 will begin at 9 p.m. this Sunday! The Discovery Channel’s Shark Week lineup looks epically JAWSOME as it will celebrate its 25th year of television greatness!

To quote one of my favorite comedies, “Step Brothers,” Shark Week is simply “raw power.” What’s not to love about this amazing television event? Sharks have mystified humans for years. They are fascinating creatures, specifically the great whites. Anytime I hear about a shark attack, it’s like a train wreck and I can’t stop reading or watching coverage. As inaccurate as it may be of shark behavior, “Jaws” continues to be one of my favorite movies. I even enjoy awesomely bad shark movies, like “ Deep Blue Sea ”…“A shark ate me!” – Samuel L. Jackson Voice. Sharks do get a bad rep, sadly. I am sure they would prefer a seal to human flesh, which probably tastes gross. With Shark Week, we get a glimpse into how sharks really live.

Biting into this year’s Shark Week lineup and kicking off the glorious event will be “Air Jaws Apocalypse” at 9 p.m. Sunday, Aug. 12. Air Jaws Apocalypse will pick up right where 2011’s “Ultimate Air Jaws” left off. As Ultimate Air Jaws was one of last year’s best Shark Week features, I have high expectations for Air Jaws Apocalypse, and look forward to seeing more great white shark jawsomeness! Following Air Jaws Apocalypse will be “Shark Week’s Impossible Shots,” where a team of wildlife cameramen will head to South Africa to try to secure a rare shot of a great white. If they succeed, I am sure all Shark Week enthusiasts will want the image for their computer screen savers!

Shark Week action will continue on Monday evening with “Sharkzilla” (9 p.m.). Just the name “Sharkzilla” leads me to believe that this will be epic. The special is geared to celebrate this year’s 25th anniversary of Shark Week. Throughout the special the Discovery Channel will attempt to resurrect the largest shark known to ever swim in our oceans, the Megalodon. Supposedly this shark could have ruffed up even the likes of a T-Rex, according to the Discovery Channel’s website! Starring in this special will be some of the Mythbusters team! So don’t miss the awesomely named special, Sharkzilla! If you are a Mythbusters fan, you won’t want to miss the “Mythbusters’ Jawsome Shark Special,” set to air at 10 p.m. following Sharkzilla. On Tuesday, all of you “Jaws” fans like me must tune in for “How Jaws Changed the World” (9 p.m.)

Other specials that I look forward to with this year’s Shark Week include “ Great White Highway ” (9 p.m., Thursday) and “Shark Week’s 25 Best Bites” (10 p.m., Thursday). This year’s jawsome lineup also includes: “Adrift: 47 Days With Shark” (10 p.m., Tuesday) and “Shark Fight” (9 p.m. Wednesday). A full schedule and description of shows is available at the Discovery Channel's Shark Week Page: Shark Week 2012.

So be sure to not miss this jawsome-winning event! If you are a fellow lover of Shark Week, tell us why you enjoy this television event so much! Also, make sure to check Dump on Saturday for a special post where Hobo Dan will countdown his favorite shark-themed movies!